Maggie has struggled with learning delays for most of her 8 young years. She attended a special-needs preschool for a while, because I didn't feel equipped to handle her needs. It's funny, though. I visited her classroom a few times, and was surprised that they weren't doing anything with her that I wasn't already doing at home. I thought they had some magic skills that I don't possess because I don't have a Master's in Special Education.
First of all, I have the greatest respect for teachers (but only the good ones!). I think it's wonderful that a person would devote his/her life to children. I also think it's wonderful how they are trained to help so many children with so many different disabilities. While I will never know how to work with every learning disability out there, I CAN become an expert in my child and her learning struggles. There are several good books out there (THIS one is the best!) and people (HSLDA has 3 special needs consultants) who can help you.*
After Maggie and I spent the last several years working hard, we finally got to the point last year where I felt like she wasn't dreadfully behind all her peers (After the "education experts" said this would never happen!!!) I was looking forward to this year being a little easier, a littler quieter, a little more fun. I was hoping to escape once in a while to meet Joe for lunch, or do some sewing now and then.
How does the saying go? Man plans; God laughs? I spent a couple of days grieving-grieving the little girl I lost to autism,** grieving the "big plans" I had made to lunch with my husband, grieving the all the times I would never be able to get pizza delivery because of our dietary changes... After shedding a few tears for a few days while cradling nothing but Haagen Dazs for comfort, I stood up, brushed myself off, and now stand ready to fight the good fight.
I find it interesting how all of the challenges I've had to work through with Maggie now present themselves again: the struggle with whether to send Karis and Zach to school and embarking on a new nutrition plan. Now, a few years later, I'm able to really weigh the facts and make decisions more confidently.
We visited the local developmental preschool last week. It's a daily program for 2 1/2 hours a day. Zach just screamed and threw things the entire time we were there. The reality is, one-on-one therapy will be much more effective in reaching Zach and Karis than being one (or two) of 10 children in a classroom. "It'll be OK," they told me, "we'll just give him his own aide." But it won't be OK. He'll be miserable, he'll make everyone else miserable, he won't be receptive to any type of learning. Plus the disruption of getting everyone up, dressed, fed on a special diet, driving 45 minutes one-way... No thanks.***
*Though, sometimes it is best to send you child to school, if you really don't know where to start or don't have the option to homeschool. Just do what's best for your family and good grief, don't feel guilty about it!
**Zach was always a bit quirky, so I knew he wasn't wired typically early on. Karis' regression into autism was very painful for me, because she didn't start out that way.
***Not today, anyway. I completely and wholly reserve the right to change my mind at any time.
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